I hope you're sitting down

So I just finished the March socks whilst watching the exciting finale of the Tour de France. I've had my Lance Armstrong fix for the year, and now I'm just sad that's the end of my new secret Swiss boyfriend for a while. And so here are the March socks.



So, on to the May socks, right?







This is going to blow your mind.

I STARTED THE JULY SOCKS BEFORE THE MAY SOCKS.

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I STARTED THE JULY SOCKS BEFORE THE MARCH SOCKS WERE FINISHED.

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I AM WORKING SOCK CLUB SOCKS OUT OF ORDER!

The Earth is still rotating on its axis. I wanted to see what would happen, and all is well. Or I guess it would be more accurate to say all is normal.




So now my oldest project is boring old mindless monkey knitting socks. And my second oldest project is lace:

This is the kimono shawl, worked in sport weight sock yarn. I am not going to have enough, so I'm getting more, and working on a way to obscure any dye lot variation issues. I am pretty confident I'll figure it out. I really like this purple stuff. A buddy made a Baby Surprise Jacket for The Bean from this yarn, and I knew I had to have some.

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By the way, knitting lace with regular yarn is way easier than knitting lace with lace weight yarn. I highly recommend it.

Knitting Round-up

Lalala. So here's some stuff that's done or sortadone:



First, I have completed one of the March sock club socks. It is pictured here along with a mostly done Decimal cardi:


The Decimal cardi is now completely done. It lives in my office, where there is no good space for spreading it out for a full photo, but no matter:

And here's a detail:

Pretty? It isn't exactly what I pictured in my head, and I have to fuss with it to keep it on my shoulders when I'm walking around, but I like it.

By the way, this is my desk calendar from Uncle Sam, exhorting me not to be a bigot:

Because if I were inclined to be a bigot, a little message printed on my calendar would change my mind.

The Tatiana mittens are done. There are two pairs, one set of gloves with a cap that buttons over the fingers for when it's extra cold, and one set of fingerless mitts with cap:

They turned out kinda cute, but this pattern was not a keeper for reasons I've already mentioned.

And here are the Icehouse socks, finished a few weeks ago. They look better than I remembered. Good job Dirtbunny.

I have no photo of the plain blue Regia socks. They look like plain blue self-patterning socks. Use your imagination. I finished one this weekend. Because I have turned out some saggy socks in the past, I endeavored to make this one a little tighter. It was. The first one was so tight that my seven-year-old niece had trouble getting it on and off. I ripped it out and have started over on bigger needles. We'll see. If they suck, I'll never know, because The Man won't offer even constructive and useful and helpful criticism of the things I knit for him.

Aaaaaaand, I found an excellent pattern for a hat on Knitty.com, and I'm knitting a whole pile of Halfdome hats in leftover yarn. Hats are great because they are mindless monkey knitting (mostly, except for the occasional decreases) and because they are finished at about the same time I get sick of them. I have lotsandlots of leftover yarn that is going to become hats.

I have several sweaters planned in my head, but my next one is going to be a short-sleeved ribbed cardigan from Pam yarn. Pammie helped me get some work done today, and I want to do something beautiful with her beautiful Colinette ribbon yarn. We'll see how it turns out.

Decimal Cardi

Is done. Just done. Whew. That was a slog. I don't have the nerve to try it on.

Tatiana

First: Koigu minis, crappily photographed.

Next, Tatiana mittens, in progress.

There are more pieces parts yet to do on these. I have decided that they are not fun, although they are kind of cute. And my colorwork is not very even or smooth. Those problems are my fault for not being a perfect knitter.

And the pattern turns out fairly big and loose hands, but tight and short fingers, and there isn't enough give on the cuff to allow for the rolling tendency of stockinette stitch, and this means the pattern on the cuff doesn't show properly. Those problems are the pattern's fault for not being a very good pattern.

I will, however, finish them as planned, because I am compulsive, because I want to get rid of the yarn, and because the hardest part is over already.

Third, the decimal sweater. I have moved on the the second sleeve. When I have about fourteen inches of sleeve, I join all three pieces together and start working a raglan shoulder. I am starting to think this will not be done in time for warm weather.

Four, odds and ends. The Noro scarf is half done and is going to be rather short. I have turned the heel on the second Icehouse sock, so that's in the homestretch. The Stitch and Pitch squares are great mindless monkey knitting, so they are great for TV, or would be, if there were anything on.

Table IV: Swatchy Socky Jinxey Pammie

As you may recall, I went stash diving and yarn shopping recently, and I am trying to make sense of what is on the table so I can actually choose something to work on. I am a little worried that the end result of all this is going to be lace, but we'll see.


First, Swatchy:




Can't knit a sweater unless you know the gauge, and can't know gauge unless you are a savant with major social problems-----I mean unless you knit a swatch. So swatch ahoy.



Next, Socky:




The May sock club sock came the other day, so I was inspired to cast on the March sock club sock, which you can see here on the top. It does not involve embroidery, as I had feared, but every sixth row requires me to make a rosebud, which isn't all that hard, but my rosebuds don't look very much like the rosebuds in the photo. Also, the pattern was designed by the Yarn Harlot, and she is shall we say a little OCD in the best possible way and that means that the winding twining rose pattern goes in different directions on the left and right sock. Sigh. She's right. It should be this way. But the end result is a few ticks in difficulty away from mindless monkey knitting. Speaking of which, I needed some no-look mindless monkey knitting to do at Stitch and Pitch last weekend, so I cast on a plain self-patterning sock, which you see here on the bottom.




Three, Jinxey:













That's right. No photo. I have been stocking up on some nice Cascade 220 in appropriate team colors for various national futbol teams in anticipation of World Cup 2010. (It's like "Magna Carta." The snobs--I mean cognoscenti speak it without the definite article.) Qualifiers are ongoing, so I have probably cast a jinx on certain teams that shall remain nameless. This stuff is all going into opaque bags and into the closet where we will not mention them---Nay!----think of them until qualifiers are over. La la la. Moving on.






D, Pammie:


Let's say you have a friend whom you love very much. She's a knitter, but she doesn't knit anything for herself. She knits a little for people she knows, but mostly, she knits for charity. She has taken a good look around this crappy world and decided that she is one lucky girl and there but for the grace of God, etc. she could succumb to her mental illness and be destitute and unsafe and on the street. Let's say you and everyone else who knows her admire her for her compassion for the less fortunate. Let's say you feel selfish by comparison. Then let's say your friend enters a dark time and decides she can't see any way back into the light so she kills herself. After the dust settles from this horrible shock and pain, let's say you end up with some of her yarn. What on earth do you do with her yarn?

Those are some odds and ends of a pretty decent quality acrylic from Pammie, plus a ball of yellow I got at Stitch and Pitch. Given the amounts I have, the Stitch and Pitch charity project is perfect for Pammie's yarn, and I think she would approve. I really miss her.

Table III: Just getting started

We have finished up with the old, stale photos and are now moving on to the actual crap on the actual table.



So



Tatiana mittens from two weeks ago:

Tatiana mittens now:

I know! They're actually gloves! Imagine!





And here is the baby surprise jacket:

I have enough yarn left to make another.

Table II: Dirtbunny is slow

More old photos.


So this is the Decimal cardigan, back when it was a sleeve and the cast-on edge of the body. As you can see, it is pink. When I work on it in public, people assume it's for a baby, because of the color. Sigh No, it's for Dirtbunny. Pink is not just for babies. It is also for pale girls with light brown hair.

And this is the baby surprise jacket, back before the surprise (haha, right Mel?)

And here is the Decimal cardigan when there were about 30 rows done on the body, plus a little more of the baby surprise jacket.

And here is the Yarn Bandit who, coincidentally, is not peeing in the house in this particular photo, although how I managed to capture a non-leaky moment I cannot explain.

He doesn't look naughty, but he is.